


File 1765C

by slightly_ajar



Series: Paperwork, Letters and Lists [2]
Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: i have absolutely no idea how to tag this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:20:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26101819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightly_ajar/pseuds/slightly_ajar
Summary: The following account records the answers given by agent Angus MacGyver to the questions put to him in the official investigation into the events of February 12th 2020, hereby referred to as “The Incident”
Series: Paperwork, Letters and Lists [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2060865
Comments: 10
Kudos: 23





	File 1765C

The following account records the answers given by agent Angus MacGyver to the questions put to him in the official investigation into the events of February 12th 2020, hereby referred to as “The Incident”: 

\- No, my colleagues and I were returning from another assignment when we noticed something that looked of the ordinary and went to investigate. 

\- There had been a successful outcome. 

\- It's all been referred to the cyber crimes division, there's a task force running with them and LAPD S.W.A.T. 

\- I’m not really at liberty to say – you’ll need to refer that to my manager. 

\- It was approximately 2.25pm. 

\- Three men and two women in a van and another woman walking a dog. 

\- Is that relevant? 

\- A Staffordshire bull terrier. 

\- Smoke. 

\- It was only supposed to take a minute, we wanted to be sure. My team and I have been doing this for long enough to trust our instincts about something not being right. 

\- The doors were locked but my team and I heard sounds that we identified as cries of distress from inside. 

\- They’d been boarded up. And the work had been done recently, there was no signs of rust on the nails or weathering to the wooden planks. 

\- It’s surprising how many things can be used as a lock pick. 

\- That only works on TV. 

\- It smelled like aniseed balls. 

\- A Swiss Army Knife. 

\- Of course it did, you’ve met her haven’t you? 

\- We were not aware of that at the time. 

\- It was a strategic decision. Anything else would have taken longer, getting visual confirmation was a priority. 

\- My teammates and I are all fully trained. 

\- On multiple occasions. In house and in the field. Immersive training is the best training and it’s impossible to create a lesson plan that includes every possible situation but everyone in my team is able to adapt their skills to suit the situation that they’re in. 

\- Improvising. Exactly. 

\- The ceiling was too high. 

\- The physics was sound. 

\- There was enough for a counterweight. 

\- Tension verses force. 

\- Pretty quickly, in fact. 

\- Behind a false wall. 

\- I noticed drag marks on the floor that stopped abruptly. 

\- My manager ran a search and found old blue prints of the building. What we discovered wasn’t on the original plans. 

\- The paint on the walls in there was fresher than in the other rooms and there were piles of sawdust in the corners. 

\- A few but they were quite small. 

\- It would be easy enough with basic construction machinery. You can get the equipment you'd need from a hardware store and there's no reason that anyone buying it would raise any suspicions - it's what anyone doing work in their yard would get. 

\- Once with a jack hammer and once with a hard hat and a large screwdriver. 

\- You’d be surprised. 

\- With a small electrical current. 

\- On seven separate occasions. 

\- Red. 

\- No comment. 

\- That seemed unlikely. 

\- Not in my previous experience. 

\- We had to make a decision based on the intel we had at the time. It was one of those split second decisions you have to make when you're in the field. 

\- Four cell phones.

\- It can invalidate the warranty, it depends on what insurance you have. 

\- The witness was concussed and confused but they said they'd heard a rhythmic clanging from near where they were being held. 

\- They were distressed but not too badly hurt. I think they were more shocked than anything else. 

\- They were given basic first aid at the scene and then they were taken care of by paramedics later. 

\- As far as I’m aware they’re back with their family. 

\- They said they expect a full recovery. 

\- I hope so. 

\- It isn’t possible at that depth. 

\- Each time I've seen it that's what's happened. 

\- Given the circumstances and the information we had available to us it seemed like the best course of action. My teammates and I communicated our concerns with our manager and she'd said that we should proceed , she thought the same thing that we did.

\- We were concerned that there could be more hostages. We were also worried that there was a larger plan in action, it looked like something was about to start that was intended to have a devastating impact. 

\- Not for over eighteen months. 

\- On Fridays. 

\- There was a potential for lives to be at risk. 

\- The fire hadn’t burnt hot enough to destroy all the evidence. 

\- It does when you add ammonia. 

\- Not if you’re very careful. 

\- Only a little bit and the blisters heal pretty quickly. 

\- My organisation did reach out but were told additional resources would be delayed by the parade. 

\- We estimated that it could affect least twenty thousand people. 

\- My team has an unconventional relationship with the term ‘authorised access’. 

\- We used it to boost a nearby Wi-Fi signal. 

\- Alan Turing did it first. 

\- Only two satellites. 

\- Potentially city wide. 

\- That would depend on a variety of factors and most of them were beyond our control, things like wind direction and traffic levels. 

\- Minutes. 

\- I have seen something similar happen. The effects were widespread and devastating.

\- I can neither confirm nor deny that I have ever visited that region of Afghanistan. 

\- Without a doubt. 

\- I didn’t want to wait to find out - would you? 

\- We were relying on getting permission retrospectively. 

\- Not even if we moved really quickly. 

\- There was a risk of collapse. 

\- Approximately twenty feet. 

\- My team and I all agreed. 

\- Something like that. 

\- Leonard Nimoy in The Wrath of Khan. 

\- No comment. 

\- That wouldn’t have been strong enough to jam the signal, it needed more power behind it to reach the right frequency. 

\- With enough torque but there would be too much inertia to build up the correct speed. 

\- It was surprisingly rusty. 

\- My team and I have dealt with situations like that before. 

\- No, there are no records of that. 

\- We were somewhere that doesn’t officially exist with someone who doesn’t have an official rank while we were officially in a different location. 

\- It was an interesting and challenging day. 

\- That can happen, I’ve learnt to compartmentalise it. Everyone who does this job knows how to do that. 

\- You might need to have a higher security clearance. 

\- The NSA. 

\- I made three more flashlights. 

\- The tricky part can be finding an accelerant that doesn’t burn up too quickly. 

\- Rats. 

\- They’re actually very intelligent animals. 

\- No. 

\- Yes. 

\- We had to be careful, one of my teammates has an allergy. 

\- It gives off a faint glow under an ultraviolet light. 

\- My agency has an asset with a contact at MI6. 

\- Our asset can be very persuasive, it’s one of his main skills. That and the fact that he’s richer than Tony Stark can open a lot of doors. 

\- The information allowed the technical staff in my organisation to run computer based simulations our computer labs. They did multiple tests and they did found that was the most consistent outcome. 

\- It hasn’t been released on the open market yet but, like I said, my team are able to access resources in a way that isn’t always technically ‘authorised’. 

\- At the other end. 

\- Our initial visual assessment counted six people. 

\- We managed to take a photograph of three of them and facial recognition confirmed their identities. They were all on a FBI watch list and were suspected of domestic terrorism. 

\- Not previously, they'd just been responsible for posting threats online and they were linked to some vandalism and robberies but what we saw made us believe that they had expanded their operations. 

\- It was pieced together using a combination of plans of the nearby buildings and photographs from their website. 

\- My organisations technicians built a virtual model and did a walk through to identify blind spots and potential hiding areas. 

\- The first three were disabled quietly. 

\- None of them were in a fit state to be able to answer questions. We didn’t think they’d tell us anything anyway. They seemed to be that militant type of follower who's almost eager for the opportunity to die for their cause. 

\- I could have made some if I'd been able to find any nitrous oxide but there was none to hand. 

\- In a store room. We actually found some useful items in there. 

\- Four batteries, a wrench, a coil of wire, aluminium foil and a glass phial. 

\- Not at the time but I figured I would be able to use them later. 

\- The leader was armed. 

\- I trusted her, her unarmed combat skills are exceptional. 

\- Yes, two at once. 

\- It was only superficial. 

\- When we opened it up we found that the circuits had been damaged by the bullets. 

\- I don’t expect so, entropy only increases over time. 

\- We had to make a brand new motherboard then fuse it with the original system. 

\- Spare parts and two radios and some duct tape. 

\- I’ve never had a bad experience with duct tape. 

\- I’m afraid that’s classified. 

\- Yes, on the other side of the city. 

\- The Phoenix Foundation has a stockpile of prosthetics for occasions like that one. The pieces were are generic but they’re of a very high standard and have always worked in the past. 

\- A swipe card. 

\- Anyone with enough nerve and basic pick pocketing skills could have. My manager said she would offer to review the company’s security protocols as a courtesy when the situation was resolved. 

\- It didn’t take long to upload. 

\- Fifteen seconds maybe, twenty at the most. 

\- It wasn’t the first time she’d done something like that. 

\- I am unable to say. 

\- An international incident – I’m sure you understand. 

\- No, the intention was to confuse the tracking signals so the programme would stall and revert to it’s defaults. 

\- Have you ever accidentally put your phone back to factory settings? It’s the same principle as that, any new data would be erased including targeting coordinates and timing instructions. 

\- With six seconds to spare. 

\- I don’t expect they’ll ever know. I think that has to be for the best. 

\- They were taken to the Phoenix Foundation headquarters and then to a black site as far as I understand. 

\- For processing and interrogation. 

\- The whole group hopefully, and any affiliates. 

\- They had to have funding from somewhere to be able to buy the equipment that we saw. 

\- Some of it was top of the range. 

\- Potentially, or a friend in a high place. 

\- That’s what I thought. 

\- It could have. 

\- There was no reason to think that our plan would fail. 

\- We have had closer calls than that one. 

\- If our strategy hadn’t worked? You and I wouldn’t be having this conversation. 

\- Yes, just smouldering rubble. 

\- Sometimes. 

\- How will you sleep now that you know everything about The Incident? 

\- And tomorrow night? And a night three weeks from now? 

\- And what would that achieve? Would you be able to be a loving spouse, a caring family member, a good friend or an effective agent? 

\- You have to make a choice about how you want to live. 

\- What’s the alternative? 

\- It can be bliss. I absolutely understand that, but knowledge can be too. I’d rather know and respond than blithely hide from the truth. 

\- Everyday. 

\- You act, you reflect and you keep going. 

I, Angus MacGyver, hereby confirm that I have answered these questions truthfully and to the best of my knowledge and that by signing this document I am agreeing for it to be recorded as an official documentation of my version of the events previously named. 

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve just read a short story by Neil Gaiman called Orange where a young woman is describing an otherworldly experience she and her family have just had and it’s done in the style of an official interview, with the story being a list of different answers that the girl is giving to someone who is clearly a shady Men In Black type operative. I liked it and after listening to the audiobook I thought, ‘you could do that with a MacGyver mission,’ so I did.
> 
> I have no idea how this should be tagged. At. All. None of the usual tags seem to fit it. If anyone has any idea of what tags I could use I’d love to know 😄


End file.
